How Interethnic Communications ruined my reality

I had no idea what I was signing up for when I registered for my required course: Interethnic Communications. Generally I try to get my books in advance so I can start reading them ahead of schedule (with my life and schedule sometimes that's the only way I can guarantee I'll get the books done between trips to the grocery store, schools, and activities for the kids) and I was a little surprised at the title of our text: Why are all the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria?(also available on Nook) Even more surprising was getting about 34 pages into the book and being told I'm a racist because I'm white. I can look back on all this in retrospect now, with a greater understanding of why that phrase is correct, but at the time it was hard to swallow.

As even Tatum says in her book, being called a racist is probably one of the worst things you can say to a white person. It's a horrible feeling, like you've been punched in the gut... like you're scum of the earth. But that's only if you're using the word racist defined as: Someone with prejudiced beliefs/actions against a person of color. Tatum, however, uses David Wellman's definition of racism: A system of advantage based on race, which just happens to benefit whites in America.

No one reading this blog will have the opportunity to read or participate in the *lengthy* discussion board questions we answered and hear how racism affected many of the people in our class. I myself had to think back on my life and remember just how strong an influence racism had even into my youth. How many homes have you seen with outdoor bathrooms for "the help?" (Maybe you never realized that is what they were for). I came to realize myself that my husband had probably experienced a bit of racism in his life and since he's been reading the book and we've continued our dialogue he's begun to identify experiences in his teenage years with what is outlined as "Oppositional Identity Development."

It's not as though I believed there was no racism left. I knew there were still a few nasty people out there, and that the KKK still holds parts of the Midwest; but I believed the turmoil and segregation of the 1950's and Jim Crow were long gone, replaced by socioeconomic issues. I never realized that those socioeconomic issues were just the remnants of the system that has been in place for generations. I didn't realize until I began looking for it that you still see the cute blond white children in the front center of ads, and the addition of a diverse cast is only masking the fact that commercials and media are still being directed to capture the attention of white families. This is the type of subversive racism that's convincing everyone that "we don't have a problem anymore;" and that makes it even more dangerous.

So my reality has been broken. I realized that I'm white... something I never identified with before (because individualism is a luxury that only whites have here in America), that I am part of a race that benefits when other's don't. I came to a greater understanding of the impact of slavery, the disgraceful things we've done to the Native Americans, the damage that Japanese concentration camps inflicted on terrified families, fear of Middle Easterners/Muslims, and the violence that is being directed at Hispanics and Latinos... Now I see race everywhere.

The good news is I want to do something about it, as Tatum demands... we must become agents of change. Even in President Obama's 2008 "A More Perfect Union speech" says, “Incidents of discrimination while less overt than in the past – are real and must be addressed. Not just with words, but with deeds” (Obama, 2008), again addressing the need for active change; active dialogue. And for me that is where I'm challenged, because as much as I want to begin to discuss race and share what I have read, this is an incredibly difficult topic full of tension. I know this because I've experienced that tension in this class. The process of self discovery and acknowledgement of racism redefined gives you kind of a squirmy feeling at first. It's hard to accept that people of my race have done such horrible things. I can't change slavery, I can't change the trail of tears, I can't change our history... but I can help change our future.

I'm posting my final paper for this class on Facebook, and encourage others to read Tatum's book (follow the link in the title). I've got gobs of journals now too for anyone interested, and I'm always open for discussion.